Beautiful Answers

John: “When I was young doctor life was terrible. All I had to wear was hand-me-down clothes. Do you think my problems stem from that?”
Psychiatrist: “I doubt it. What’s so terrible about hand-me-down?”
John: “I’ve only got is older sisters.”

Mick: “Mack, did the wife have much to say about you coming home drunk last night?”
Mack: “Na, but that didn’t stop her from talking for two hours at breakfast.”

Mother: “Don’t call your sister is stupid! Tell her you’re sorry!”
Son: “OK I’m sorry you're stupid, Sis!”
 
Son: “Dad! Mum’s just backed the car out of the garage and run my bicycle over!”
Dad: “Well that’ll teach you not to leave it on the front lawn.”
 
Lady: “I’d like a pair of alligator shoes please.”
Assistant: “OK. What size does your alligator take?”
 
Creditors have better memories than debtors.
If you want to remember, become a creditor.

Joe: “What kind of dog is that you’ve got?”
Bill: He’s a pure blooded police dog.”
Joe: “Wow, he doesn’t don't look like a police dog!”
Bill: “Of course he doesn’t! He does undercover work!”

Teacher: “Ok who class, who can tell me how the counties of England got their names?”
Johnnie: Miss, Miss! Did they name them after cricket teams?